Billy Connolly’s Desiderata

Heiniger-Net Posted on by
  • Tread gen­tly on any­one who looks at you sideways.
  • Have lots of long lie-ins.
  • Wear stur­dy socks, learn to grow out of medi­um under­wear and if you must lie about your age, do it in the oth­er direc­tion: tell peo­ple you’re nine­ty-sev­en and they’ll think you look f****** great.
  • Try to catch a trout and expe­ri­ence the glo­ri­ous feel­ing of let­ting it go and see­ing it swim­ming away.
  • Nev­er eat food that comes in a bucket.
  • If you don’t know how to med­i­tate at least try to spend some time every day just sit­ting. Boo jog­gers. Don’t work out, work in.
  • Play the banjo.
  • Sleep with some­body you like.
  • Eat plen­ty of Liquorice Allsorts.
  • Try to live in a place you like.
  • Mar­ry some­body you like.
  • Try to do a job you like.
  • Nev­er turn down an oppor­tu­ni­ty to shout, ‘F*** them all!’ at the top of your voice.
  • Avoid big­ots of all descriptions.
  • Let your own bed become to you what the Pole Star was to sailors of old … look for­ward to it.
  • Don’t wear tight under­wear on aeroplanes.
  • Before you judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? … He’s a mile away and you’ve got his shoes.
  • Clean your teeth and keep the com­pa­ny of peo­ple who will tell you when there’s spinach on them.
  • Avoid peo­ple who say they know the answer and keep the com­pa­ny of peo­ple who are try­ing to under­stand the question.
  • Don’t pat ani­mals with sneaky eyes.
  • If you haven’t heard a good rumour by 11 a.m., start one.
  • Learn to feel sor­ry for music because, although it is the inter­na­tion­al lan­guage, it has no swearwords.
  • If you write a book, be sure it has exact­ly sev­en­ty-six ‘fuck’s in it.
  • Avoid giv­ing LSD to guide dogs.
  • Don’t be talked into wear­ing a uni­form and salute nobody.
  • Nev­er run with scis­sors or oth­er pointy objects.
  • Cam­paign against blue Smarties.
  • Above all, go to Glas­gow at least once in your life and have a roll and square sliced sausage and a cup of tea. When you feel the tea cours­ing over your spice-singed tongue, you’ll know what I mean when I say: ‘It’s good to be alive!’. ”
Posted in Fun

Review of a low-cost hearing aid

Heiniger-Net Posted on by

Dig­i­tal blue­tooth Hear­ing Aid USB Recharge­able Sound Ampli­fi­er Deaf-aid Audi­phone Behind Ear

For years I reg­u­lar­ly buy cheap goods from Chi­na at wish.com. I am often pos­i­tive­ly sur­prised. Of course you can’t expect top qual­i­ty, but under the giv­en cir­cum­stances, sur­pris­ing­ly good stuff often arrives in my mailbox.

In any case, I found this device in the Wish cat­a­logue, enti­tled “Dig­i­tal blue­tooth Hear­ing Aid USB Recharge­able Sound Ampli­fi­er Deaf-aid Audi­phone Behind Ear”, adver­tised in the pic­ture as a wire­less hear­ing amplifier.

This is promis­ing, I thought, and ordered two of them. These things are not only sup­posed to ampli­fy the ambi­ent sound, as hear­ing aids should, but also con­nect wire­less­ly to the mobile phone via Blue­tooth in order to lis­ten to music or even make phone calls. They also have recharge­able bat­ter­ies that can be charged via USB.

Con­tin­ue reading →

Movember — Did you donate already?

Heiniger-Net Posted on by

I decid­ed to par­tic­i­pate in the dona­tion activ­i­ty Movem­ber. The name is a mix of Mus­tache, Men and Novem­ber. The dona­tion activ­i­ty is col­lect­ing mon­ey for fight­ing typ­i­cal male ill­ness­es, such as prostate can­cer and tes­tic­u­lar can­cer, as well as fur­ther­ing psy­cho­log­i­cal health and sui­cide pre­ven­tion. A very good cause. Vis­it my dona­tion page by read­ing the QR code or click­ing the QR code image.

We stand for:

  • Pre­vent­ing sui­cide in men
    Our fathers, broth­ers, sons and friends are dying by sui­cide, every minute of every day.
    We won’t accept this. To make change hap­pen, Movem­ber views men­tal health through a male lens. We focus on ear­ly inter­ven­tion, engag­ing men and work­ing to their strengths. By 2030, we aim to reduce the rate of male sui­cide by 25%.
  • Improv­ing the qual­i­ty of life
    Men with prostate can­cer and tes­tic­u­lar can­cer face an uphill bat­tle before, dur­ing and after treat­ment. But with use­ful tools and straight-shoot­ing advice, we aim to light­en their load so these men can live life to the fullest.
  • Help­ing men take action
    Glob­al­ly, men die on aver­age 6 years ear­li­er than women, and for large­ly pre­ventable reasons.
    So we’re shin­ing a light on the health risks men need to know about, increas­ing aware­ness to stop men dying too young.
  • Team­ing up with great minds
    A cri­sis this size calls for big ideas from the bright­est minds. Movem­ber brings togeth­er the best researchers and experts from across the globe, reduc­ing research over­lap to max­imise brain­pow­er and accel­er­ate progress.

Having an everlasting impact on the face of men’s health.

How can you contribute?

Here a few pic­ture, cur­rent­ly with­out a mus­tache. The mus­tache is only grow­ing in november… 🙂
Con­tin­ue reading →